JOB AT F. B. I.

Dear my valued visitors,

The FBI had an opening for an assassin.. After all the background checks, interviews and testing were done, there were 3 finalists:

Two men and one woman..

For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.

'We must know that you will follow your Instructions no matter what the circumstances.

Inside the room you will find your wife sitting in a chair .. . . Kill her!!'

The man said, 'You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife.'

The agent said, 'Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home.'

The second man was given the same instructions.

He took the gun and went into the room. All was Quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his eyes, 'I tried, but I can't kill my wife.' The agent said, 'You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.'

Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions, to kill her husband. She took the Gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one After another. They heard screaming, crashing, Banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was Quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the Woman, wiping the sweat from her brow.

'This gun is loaded with blanks' she said.. 'I had to Beat him to death with the chair.'

MORAL:

Women are crazy. Don't mess with them.

FIVE "RULES" FOR MEN TO FOLLOW TO A HAPPY LIFE:

Dear all our valued visitors,

Let us have some BIG laugh from the bullet points leading to so called a happy life:-

1. It's important to have a woman who helps at home, who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job.

2. It's important to have a woman who can make you laugh.

3. It's important to have a woman who you can trust and who doesn't lie to you.

4. It's important to have a woman who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.

5. It's very, very important that these four women don't know each other

Trust this will never happen in life.

James

Genre: Computer Jokes

Dear our valued visitors,

Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer: "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."

Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote click'."

Trust you have a good laugh of it.

'''A Daddy's Phone Call

**Rrriiiiinnnnggg, rrriiiinnnngg,*
*
**'Hello?'**

**'Hi honey.**

**This is Daddy.**

**Is Mommy near the phone?'*

*
**'No, Daddy.**

**She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul.'**

**After a brief pause,**

**Daddy says,**

**'But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Paul.'**

**'Oh yes I do, he comes when you are not home and **

** Mommy told me to call him Uncle Paul **

**and he's upstairs in the bedroom with Mommy,**

**Right now..'**

Brief Pause.

**'Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do.**

**Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs**

**And knock on the bedroom door and shout to Mommy**

**That Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway.'*

*
**'Okay, Daddy, Just a minute.'*

*
**A few minutes later**

**The little girl comes back to the phone.*

*

**'I did it, Daddy.'*

*
**'And what happened, honey?' *

*
**'Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on **

** and ran around screaming.**

**Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser**

**And now she isn't moving at all!'*

*
**'Oh my God! What about the Uncle Paul?'*

*
**'He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too.*

*
**He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window**

**And dived into the swimming pool.**

**But I guess he didn't know that you took out the water**

**Last week to clean the pool.*

*

**He hit the bottom of the pool with a big splat... and I think he's dead.'*

*
*****Long Pause****

*
*****Longer Pause****

*

*****Even Longer Pause****

*
**Then Daddy says,*

*
**'Swimming pool? ...........*

*

**Is this 486-5731?'

*
**No, I think you have the wrong number...'''.....*

Have a good laugh

The Colonoscopy

All the organs of the body were having a meeting,
trying to decide who was the one in charge.

"I should be in charge," said the brain,
"Because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would happen."

"I should be in charge," said the blood ,
"because I circulate oxygen all over so without me you'd all waste away ."


"I should be in charge," said the stomach ,
"because I process food and give all of you energy."

"I should be in charge," said the legs,
"because I carry the body wherever it needs to go."

"I should be in charge," said the eyes,
"Because I allow the body to see where it goes."

"I should be in charge," said the rectum,
"Because I'm responsible for waste removal."

All the other body parts laughed at the rectum
and insulted him, so in a huff, he shut down tight.

Within a few days,
the brain had a terrible headache,
the stomach was bloated,
the legs got wobbly,
the eyes got watery,
and the blood was toxic.

They all decided that the rectum should be the boss.

The Moral of the story?
The ass hole is usually the one in charge!

Ha!Ha! The story does not end here